Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Nutmeg, I'm Fu@*ing Matt (car)Damon

Dear Nutmeg,

We had a great run. You taught me that peach pie could have some bite, you foiled the mice that would chew leaves in my garden, you even rubbed yourself on my turkey a few times (oh yea you did).

But someone new has come into my life, and I really need to give them a chance.

Yes, you know him, I believe he even works with you at Spicecabinet, INC. It doesn't matter what his name is.

Look, you know we haven't been getting along so well recently. Ever since the accident (and your unfortunate lid-cracking), you haven't been the same. You mess up the house, leak all over, and really, I think have been pretty bland and stale. A couple of times when you couldn't perform, I was forced to look elsewhere for love, and well, while cinnamon and anise were good flings, it was cardamon that made me see the light.

Shoot, well there, now you know his name. Its not his fault. If it wasn't him, it would have been someone else. I know I saw lemon zest looking at me a little too long last time I was around your place.

Cardamon just gets me. He's lemony without being sour, and is as comfortable in a sweet pie as he is in a spicy curry. He doesn't mind me spicing things up by bringing allspice, cinnamon, the cloves, or even thyme along with us when we get to it. You never wanted to share the spotlight.

Its not serious or anything- I hope that he also makes his way around my group of friends. He's so delicious, its a sin to keep him to myself. I hope they try him out.

I even heard that he has a black brother that is, well, even more talented. So maybe I might look him up.

Anyway, I digress.

I just need some space.

But, I will always think of you, and who knows, maybe someday, on a hot June afternoon, when the peaches are ripe, I might come calling back around your place.

In the meantime, lets just play our song one last time.

Love always,


1 comment:

Department of Plate said...

I laughed very hard at this post :)